Does it ever seem like you and your partner fight over basically anything?
It can be over something as simple as what series to start first or what to eat for dinner.
Every couple argues, it’s inevitable, and although the topic you argue over is significant, how you communicate during those arguments is more important.
Improperly handling disagreements can turn a little problem into a big one and hugely impact how your relationship progresses in the future.
No matter the reason for your spat, you should know how to effectively communicate with your significant other to help prevent serious relationship problems.
Here’s some advice on how to compromise and move forward in your relationship despite differences you and your significant other (SO) may have.
Recognize and Discuss the Issue
One of the first things that you should do when you notice tension between you and your partner, is identify why.
Ignoring the issue will only make things worse and can hurt the relationship in the long run. Once you have identified what the problem is, you need to discuss it.
Do not let your annoyance build up, because the longer that you let something go, the greater risk you have of snapping at your SO.
It’s imperative that you go to your SO almost immediately when you realize there’s a problem. However, you don’t want to say things that you’ll regret so if you need to take some time to contemplate how you want to approach the situation, that’s okay too.
As you discuss what’s concerning you, allow your partner time to speak. You don’t want them to feel attacked or as if their opinion isn’t valid.
Make sure to listen to your partner and let them know that you understand their point of view. If you’re not listening then there won’t be any compromise.
For compromise to happen you need to objectively listen to your SO’s viewpoint. It isn’t always easy to listen to someone when you feel like your right and they’re wrong.
However, put yourself in your SO’s shoes, and try to think from their perspective. Consider how you would like the situation to go if the roles were reversed, and your partner was the one with the problem.
Being able to convey your problem clearly to your partner and in a way that resonates with them is key. You want to make sure you’re properly expressing your thoughts and feelings while also considering theirs.
Although it can be tempting sometimes to raise your voice, try to refrain from doing so. You can get your point across without yelling by using a calm and rational approach.
If your communication skills aren’t the best, just make sure to focus your attention on your partner and be completely open and honest.
Compromise and Adjust
After properly working through what your issues are you and your SO need to come up with a solution that will benefit both of you.
Whether you are arguing about the type of furniture you want in your living room or about where to go to eat dinner, there are ways to appease both parties.
It may be simple solutions like allowing your partner to pick out the sofa, while you pick out the coffee table. Or deciding to go to the restaurant you want on Tuesday and going to the restaurant of your partners choosing on Wednesday.
Solutions may seem hard to swallow at first if they are regarding crucial decisions in your life, but once you realize how important it is to your partner it will make the decision a no brainer.
There’s nothing worse than thinking that you’ve come to an agreement only for your partner to completely disregard everything that you said.
If you say that you’re going to do something, or not do it, then make sure you stick to it. How you keep up your end of the bargain will impact how your partner reacts in future arguments.
If they feel like they can’t trust your word then it’ll make it hard to want to compromise with you in the future.