Let’s be honest: Sex isn’t all smooth moves and easy ecstasy.
Making love can get awkward, especially if you’re sleeping with someone for the first time or are trying a new position with a long-time partner. Sometimes, problems of coitus coordination can kill the mood or even result in injury. Sex is a deeply personal joint effort – no wonder it doesn’t go off without a hitch every time.
In this article, we set out to discover the most common awkward sex experiences and what causes them. To do so, we surveyed 800 men and women in Europe and the United States about their intimate encounters that proved less than ideal. We also studied the methods they chose to solve or avoid these issues in the future. Our results reveal that awkward sex is quite common – but improvement is definitely possible as well. To see how your awkward sex experiences compare to everyone else’s, keep reading.
Things can get pretty painful when lovers aren’t on the same page: In the heat of the moment, accidents can occur. In fact, roughly 99 percent of respondents said they’d experienced some mishap of this variety, and the most common form of misfortune was bumping heads with one’s partner.
Unfortunately, individuals who suffer sex injuries are sometimes less than transparent with their doctors about how their ailments occurred. But if our findings are any indication, sex accidents are so common that those experiencing them have nothing to be embarrassed about.
CLUMSY SEX CAUSES
Our findings suggest awkward sex experiences are virtually universal: Over 99 percent of respondents could recall one of their own. But if it happens to everyone, what are some common reasons these uncomfortable sexual moments occur?
Sex experts suggest slight adjustments can make sex more enjoyable for any body type – in many cases, a simple pillow can work wonders.
AVOIDING PAST PITFALLS
Do awkward sex experiences or accidents prompt us to avoid those very scenarios in future encounters? Our data indicate that many people now abstain from certain positions, places, and sex acts because of an uncomfortable past experience.
Some people wrote off entire broader categories of sexual encounters, including approximately a quarter of respondents who wrote off bondage due to past negative experiences. Others were more concerned about the location of their lovemaking: 27 percent said gaining membership to the mile-high club was not an experience worth repeating.
In response to awkward sex, many respondents opted to stick with classic positions moving forward.
Interestingly, however, some of the options on this list were the very same positions that other respondents said they’d never try again because of an awkward experience.
Of course, an awkward experience or two need not dissuade you from seeking improvement. Our respondents tried a range of methods to make sex more enjoyable, including some quite simple tools. Some reported lubricant had been helpful – interestingly, men were more likely to say so than women. Another simple adjustment related to ambiance: Thirteen percent of women and 11 percent of men adjusted the lighting to set the mood.
These varied conclusions suggest no universal rules for eliminating awkwardness: We all must explore our own needs.
KEEPING SEX COMFORTABLE
Our findings suggest most people encounter awkward sex and lovemaking mishaps at some point in their lives. Accordingly, these experiences shouldn’t be interpreted as the fault of either partner: Like most things in life, sex often entails imperfection. The good news is that progress is possible. As in many aspects of our romantic relationships, awkward sex is a challenge best dealt with through open communication.
The solution may be as simple as a change in position or the addition of a pillow. But if your concerns remain unspoken, you’ll never have the chance to know.