Relationships Sex

Why Sex Is Important in a Relationship

Why sex is important in a relationship? Because it just is. Can I leave it at that? No? Okay, ha.Sex is one of the most confusing and lied about discussions I’ve ever had this misfortune to talk about. Let me give you the 411, folks.

We are lied to about sex constantly in our lives, by the media, by the news, by celebrities, by our friends, and sometimes by our parents. All to sell the lie that our lives are happy and comfortable. But perhaps if we look deep inside ourselves then we’ll understand that it’s not all that it’s cracked up to be, and that, do we truly reflect on why sex is important in a relationship?

I hear the institution of Marriage is failing. Men and women are getting divorced at an incredible rate and most of those divorces are being initiated by women. It’s true, women no longer need to put up with our rubbish anymore. They can just get divorced and move onto the next lucky guy. All the while the man is left to pick up the pieces of his life, angry and confused he then finds something like mgtow where he can relinquish all responsibility and blame all of his problems all on women.

See, I was one such man at a point in my life. I could have easily went my own way and not looked back. Granted, my life would have been easier, but I definitely wouldn’t have felt as fulfilled as I do now. Why? Because sex is good, my child is awesome, and having someone to actually give a hoot about whether I live or die is a better feeling than you can expect. I know why sex is important in a relationship, because with the right person it leaves you feeling complete. One lesson that I like to teach people is to never settle for, “mediocre.” I punched well above my weight and got there. I see question after question on Quora with someone telling us he likes a woman but he doesn’t know if he, “loves,” her. It’s a no-brainer in my mind.

Anyway, to the point. Did you know that,

Women enjoy sex just as much as men do?

Why Sex Is Important in a Relationship

See? We were lied to. I was told as a young boy that women didn’t enjoy sex and that it was a necessary evil within the relationship. I definitely had no men to talk to on this issue, and the friends that I have talked to in the past tell me that sex dwindles off into nothing the further into the relationship that we go. If you asked me in my youth why sex was important in a relationship I’d have said, “because the man needs it,” but that was false.

I hear women are lied to on that front too. I don’t know about 2019 but I’ve heard some horror stories of the things people have told women about what they should expect from sex with men. From parents, from schoolteachers and from friends; all reflective of what they have experienced through sex. Sometimes it can put them off it for good. Those few bad experiences spoil it for the rest of us.

No, with women, sex can be enjoyable if they communicate what they want in the bedroom and they’ll be fine. Us men aren’t mind readers, they need to tell us what they want in bed. If women do that then their sex life should get better. With the right man, of course.

Men don’t always want sex

Contrary to popular belief the way to catch a solid man looking for a relationship isn’t by going out in a tiny dress. Well, it is, but you’ll have to understand how the male brain works firstly. If you try and stimulate a man’s sexual awareness from the get go then he’s only going to want one thing, and it’s not a good discussion about family over a nice dinner that’s for sure.  Think of the style as peaking a man’s mental curiousity whilst leaving him wondering what’s beneath the clothing she wears. If she pulls it off right then before long she’ll be discussing his hopes, fears and dreams with him before a passionate night of sex. It’s why sex is important in a relationship but not the only thing. Having a personality travels a long way too.

Women are told time and time again that a way to a man’s heart is through his penis. I disagree. When I was courting my wife she made me explicitly wait for a month before I received the golden ticket to ecstasy. You see, she wanted to know what I was all about, and the enjoyable part for me is that she listened to every part of it. It was nice, I felt wanted. I was ready to take the relationship to the next level.

Don’t be fooled into thinking all women need to do is be ready available with sex to get a man, it’s not true.

Why sex is important in a relationship

Sex is important, but not the only part of a loving relationship. It’s not important because a man needs it, or that the women should get on with it. It’s important because it increases the intimacy between two loving partners. It’s not the sexual release that’s the most important part, it’s the touching, the caressing, the licking, the sucking — the being so intimate with each other on a regular basis that mind and soul become interlinked. Think about it, if you are sharing the most personal details about yourself with your partner, and are also sharing your body with them, then you become one. There is a saying when two become one and it’s there for a reason. This is truly why sex is important in a relationship

But many people place sex on the top tier importance in a relationship, and it can sometimes lead to infighting and resentment. The trick is to find where the blocks are in your relationship and move to heal them. What do I mean by blocks? Well, those places you aren’t seeing any momentum. It could be something she’s been ignoring you on, or something you aren’t quite addressing with her. Whatever the case it needs to be worked out, and like I say, actions speak louder than words.

My wife likes to say..

People these day’s are all about the sex and when that fizzles out then they have nothing left to talk to each other about. A relationship is generally an epic drama, rather than a short film. Pace yourself, you don’t need to run into sex straight away. Yes, sex is important but take quite a bit of time to get to know your partner, inside and out. You’ll have a better understanding of them before you find yourself in too deep, and it’ll be easier to get out if it’s not compatible.

Tl;dr?

Why sex is important in a relationship: Sex is a really important part of a relationship but not the most important. It’s equally important as the other things you build on with your partner throughout the course of the relationship such as trust and safety. Use your sex super power wisely, and don’t give it out too freely — unless you’re looking for a lot of free sex and then I guess that would be okay. Each to their own!

By Raymond at The Relationship Blogger


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